Lowe

No, no,no one of my old teachers from the synogauge I just learned died of cancer and I can't even make it to her funeral because I just missed 2 days of school and can't afford a 3rd one. She wasn't an old teacher either. She was one of those nice teachers that too many kids take advantage of yet continues to be nice anyways. It's not fair but then again what is. I guess we all have to die sometime. Well I'm going to go to sleep and every one needs to enjoy life while they have it because its short and every heart beat you waste is one less you get to use.

This day will end

for those of those who were trying to figure out my weird day thing today is the day that is ending.

Yesterday was the last day, today is the first, tomorrow is the beginning and the day after is the second day, the next day will end, and after that.

so anyways tomorrows the day I don't know about. I think I"m throwing caution to the wind. Wind is nice, and the moon is pretty. My minds a bit scattered, but today could be. . . a good day it didn't start that way, but then again the best things of life are those that start in the dumps and rise to the heights. Well today will end and tomorrow will begin, the next step for AD, the next stage of my life, another decision, another day, another 24 hours, each with 60 minutes and each of those filled with seconds and more impotantly are the heartbeats, each one marks a moment of life. Animals live radically different numbers of seconds, but very similiar number of heart beats. Your heart is honestly your lifeline take care of it, and just maybe it will take care of you.

Counter

I just added a counter to my page, so ha now I can keep track of all you people who refuse to comment. Come on I'm incredibly bored, I mean I never had a lot of comments but now its down to about nothing. Say somthing like what you think of my blog, a random shout out, a story, somthing about a post, or just tell me shut up if you want to, but say somthing somebody.
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O and anything you want to ask about please feel free to, anyhow
I'm pretty confusedthere are a few things I want to say and ask, but its really not. . . anyone who seems like I should tell/ask.

The second day

Today was the second day of the competion the day where we find out how we did. I knew it all along there was no way we could live up to the expectations we had set for ourselves 7-10 metals a piece clean sweeping A's B's and C's. A guaranteed spot at state. At least not with the shape our team was in. We all waited and sat at the awards ceremony. The first award 6 out of the 9 of us went up to metal. I stayed back. The next metal the other two went up while the rest of the team stayed down. I was the only one without a metal. Yay?? Then the next award our team only got one metal and it wasn't me. I knew we wouldn't clean sweep, and we might even get beat. I had the least metals on the team. I had 9, 3 bronze, 3 silver, and 3 gold. Among my golds were best team superquiz relay, best superquiz all the way and best team. The rest of my metals were individual.

studying overload

my head hurts I've been studying music and social science forever. Anyhow since today's actually been a good day. I'll spread out my complaints so that way the other days that are miserable I have less to complain about. You know it really kind of sucks when your knows somthing beyond a doubt, and your heart still hasn't caught on. Or technically one part of your brain has is sure and the part that controls emotions hasn't caught on I don't know the fancy names of the parts of the brain. Anyhow I guess thats all I get to stall. Back to studying yuck

Competition the beginning

Ahh Today was different I got to school at 10-joked till 11 got on a bus and ate this weird meal. Then at 12 we got back on the bus and started studying at 1. At two the essay began mine was 5 of their pages which would be two notebook pages long or so, maybe a little longer. It was decent, I hope. Then was interview at 4, that was fun someone really should ask me about that but I don't really have much time right now to type much. Then Speech and Impromptu. Then we went home the judges were... different and also should be asked about. Ok I got to go study for the 7 written tests tomorrow supposebly thats the fun part of AD not the free days and free food I'll report back and tell ya'll.

hmm. . .

Yesterday was the last day, today is the first, tomorrow is the beginning and the day after is the second day, the next day will end, and after that. . . well who knows. If anyone gets that congratulations, I'm glad you care but just curious how did you figure that out. Anyhow speaking of tomorrow being the beginning I don't have time to do this I have to study. O and today was fun, instead of my day (on good shorter day) being 7-5 it only went form 7-3:30 yay. I beat most everyone from my highschool home.
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You know before today I had never read anything about someone's happiness that made me depressed. In fact I've never been anything passed annoyed at other people's happiness and thats been awhile, since even that.
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If a life could be ruined by a single broken heart. . . wouldn't most the world be ruined. U know I was trying not to do this trying not to keep posting about the same person, but I am, so here goes the rest of it. You can't think that just because you broke someone's heart their life is ruined I was bound to have someone else do it sooner or later. The first time will always be the hardest, one, after that you're no longer like a newborn baby who finds everything amusing because its new to them, but your then a little more ready and hardened and really u know it will be ok, because the last time it was. . .or so I hope I get that far.
O and by the way the lines are each time I came back and edited.

lies

Today I lied, I'm sure most of you did too, but I don't lie much although it wasn't intentional in fact it was to the question what's up the I was asked now 3 times by the same person the first time I lied and said not much, the next I did't answer and the last I was honest.
Yesterday I lied but once again not on purpose although I probably would have had I realized when I told my mom I couldn't sleep and only got 3 hours if there was any reason and I said not really.
In the last month not counting today and yesterday I have probably lied to my mom on 3 days, a specific person once and another person twice.
Now the truth is an interesting thing, most everyone claims to strive for it but others aren't given much of an option. Some are cursed with the inability to lie or conciously lie with out having obvious warning signs little kids tend to smile and laugh, others like me turn red, some people merely scratch their nose, and others turn their head left.
I just yesterday realized that I may not have just decided to start being honest I may have picked it up from someone that being my little brother, now I never was an outright lyer who did things just to get on peoples nerves, and I've always been miserable at lying to get out of trouble and quickly gave up on it. But I wasn't always honest to the point of being mean, I remeber when my mom used to take us shopping she would stopped asking me if things looked good or what not because I always said they did while my brother was honest, and often he butted in with honest comments when they weren't wanted. The difference between me and him though is he chose to be honest while I was half way forced in that direction.
If truth is such a good, holy, and beneficial thing then why would people lie. Unless they believed that would benefit them more, and maybe the flat truth isn't always the most fun or the best way or maybe it is, then again it all depends on what you find important. Me I have the bad habit of shooting down all that I am, until it is beyond me to shoot it down anymore, so I of course do not find truth as my great standing champion, but more of a neutral entity, and is no more good than death or any more evil than love.
(claification I also believe death and love to be neutral, I'm not that much of a pessimist)

hey hey its me

Just a reminder the games never over, the fat lady hasn't sung, life still goes on, chances still exist, failure has caught me, death still has awhile before I need his comfort, and success has gotten closer still teasing me still to far to reach , but if you wait just long enough like a child he'll get to close and you can grab him by the wrist and take him for yourself. So to all those who feel miserable life will get better and if it doesn't well then tell me and I'll try and prove you wrong

ahhhhh

"Caring, dilgent, loving, friendly all great qualities about myself, but my greatest one I would have to say is tolerance" began one of todays impromptu's but my ability to tolerate much more has run real thin. Today was sh*@$% It would have been miserable even had a been a normal good day, but know it wouldn't even give me time to wallow in my pity, it just had to make a mockery of me and the day started half decent and fell into a horrible oblivion. I ran out on my friend while he was giving and then I ran through the band hall to get to Gov't AD was normal and band I seemed pretty ignored our section that was picking up so many complements before and now we were suddenly the ones who needed the most help although I didn't help any. Calculus was bleh, and AP Bio was alright. Lunch I think I ate bad chicken nuggets. and english we took a test. and then Lab management the lovely teacher only trusts me so the other kids weren't even allowed to help they were only allowed to stand by and laugh at me. Each class seemed to last an eternity, and every second was pretty painful. AFter school the fun began. I had to run to AD and do a band ensemble this genius brain child decided that the day before a listening was not important enough to practice and left with out even stopping at the band hall to pick up his horn. I got two people to give me hugs and try and comfort me, the first one was pretty hypocritical a guy breaks up with her friend and she stops talking to him, but her friend breaks up with me and she can comfort me. . .thanks. Then the next person should have comforted me, but it didnt' and when I left to do AD I kept meeting people, I really wanted to be left alone for once, and now people start appearing, and I got another hug from a person I really don't know. Then I ran back realizing the practice was right next door to where I started I screwed up a couple impromptu's and went back to practicing, another one of her friends decided she wasn't "feeling good" so I said I would take her listening time this weekThen when I got in the car I went on a search for my brother and couldn't find him so my mom spent 20 min yelling at me because he was no where to be found, in the middle of this she justs breaks it to me one of my best friends could be going to jail. I can't complain over anyones shoulder because I can't tell anyone the situation its not my buisness and the one person I might have, well that died. There was a fourth hug it just never happenned the only one I looked forward to, but o well.
I haven't started on my anything. I have tons of homework, and work to do. My . . .don't know what to call her at the moment, wouldn't even talk to me. Ahh probably because of what i asked, she could have just said she didn't wan't to answer. I don't know I'm pretty screwed up and lost at the moment, this is the first time I ever thought I might be ready for college and leaving this high school might not be so bad. O and more and more stuff keeps getting blamed on me I can't even remember what else was my fault but it was somthing done. I'm probably sick I don't have time to take off but I really would laugh if I ended up not showing tomorrow.

On a happier note in Gov't
Dahl's definition of power: the ability of one entity to contol in some way the behavior of another
So everyone has some power and if you don't believe find some one close to you, and tell them I love you, if you feel uncomfortable go find some one of the opposite sex now watch what happens now tell them ore some one else you hate them, most likely neither of these was entirely ignored, and you managed to manipulate them in some way maybe not for the goal you wanted but there is atleast one person you can affect.
O and one of my last hebrew things but I'm gonna use lite hebrew and no transliteration. hebrew goes right to left so this is going to be a bit complicated.
_ '_ l_ _
` _l l\l l l l l l\l here for those who can't read that its near impossible. and the letters in english order are written underneath.
aleph-tov lamed-vav aleph-nun-yud
silent t l o silent n ee

Valentines Day gift early

hey for those of you who are absolutely desperate for a Valentines quote for a gf or maybe even a bf heres one that needs a little editing, but no longer has a need. The beginning was from a speech I wrote so it may seem a little odd for anyone other than me

And to prove I was a real leader, me the shy quiet guy with a loud commanding voice I had some work to do, or in this case the romantic who could do little more than stutter I have a lot of work to do, but here goes: There are quotes about just about everything love is loving yourself, life is worthless without love, there aren’t enough starts to mark your greatness, love is missing the flaws, the list goes on, but few truly say what I truly wish to say. So. . . I love when you smile. . . I love knowing I made you happier. . . I love when you have fun with your friends. . . I love hearing you were talking about me. . .

. .I could go on forever beyond the number of quotes I found, beyond the number of stars in the sky, but you probably have class to worry about so c ya later

Study sorry no hebrew this week

Hey I have to make this quick, today hasn't been that great I couldn't even name anything that really went right, but atleast nothing went drastically wrong. Anyhow I don't get everything that happenned today like how I could keep losing people. So yea I almost got stuck at the school to 5:30 after getting everything done early. My AD team has a contest Friday and so I'll be studying all this week. So a list of hebrew words most of them I"ve probably already done.
girl yeledah
boy yeled
no lowe
yes ken
now achshav
oogah cake
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I'm exhausted its now 7 hours later than the time posted making it 12:45 and I spent half of that time trying to sleep. I'll try and be nice but most likely I'll be mean hopefully one last time and sadly I don't think its a first time.
Hey today I thought the day was over when I posted all I had left to do was study AD, but my g. . .rf kept me company and kept me smiling rather than studying. . .but then she demoted herself from gf to well rf, I guess it should be ex, but I don't want to be that just regular friends.
You know its a lot easier to make quotes when your furious enough that you'll threaten to kill even the gods from multiple religions, than when your in what you think is love. Right now I almost hate Rodrigo, he's always ("f"ing) right, always every thing in his life seems to be a model of the absolute worst life possible, while I seem to live a perfect dream, yet he always wins hes always right, and for once a doubted him It hought it was to cruel a thought, but he was right. If you care to know what he said ask. Anyhow I think I'll expand on that one quote "If I had put a star in my hand for every time you made me smile I would have the whole heavens in my hand, if I put one back for every time I cried there would be all of the heavens minus one star in my hand and if I put back another star for every tear I shed a quarter of the stars would be back in the sky and if I had to give up every star to know you were happy I would do it in a heartbeat" but most likely I'm just making things worst
Heres another
"Never forget those who help you up, always remember them,
Remember death is always there beside loyally waiting you to catch you when you fall
Remember failure is always there to comfort you, patiently waiting for success to get bored
Remember never to forget them and make new friends with success, confidence or their friends because they can get jealous, and it was them who were watching you from the beginning, always willing to lend a comforting hand when you were down. Always loyally and patiently waiting when you were ready for them. and sometimes when they were jealous they would run out and show their love the only way they know how"
Hey you know whats funny, I was finally getting confident I think I may have even been confident, thats rare for me, and before I really had much of an opportunity to show it, my life pattern caught up with me and I realized one of my biggest fears was true, I wasn't making people happier I was making them miserable. Heres an metafor for anyone who understands it great. When you see the lantern across the hall and you see its beauty flashing before you run and decide how to take it off that hook, first look and make sure there is a floor all the way there, and if it is to dark to see ahead, then don't run with your head held to high, but rather look down and watch for wholes or ends at least periodically.
I hate what I don't understand, I finally understand why people have always tried to get rid of or change what they don't understand. From the Native peoples in many countries being called barbarians and pushed off their lands several times to nearly genocide, or just religions religions not understanding one so having to convert or exile it. I wonder if I had an army. . .would I try and kill all emotions. You know they've been bothering me for awhile, randomly miserable, randomly happy with out much reason, and I love knowing reasons for everything but in the end I had all I needed and thought I wanted so I didn't really care, but after having a few emotions torn (sorry) what you wanted changes and what you have changes and your relationship with emotion changes. As I was lying in bed I realized today I was supposed to be happy all day because I read my own profile and didn't check my blog after. In fact I really furious about how much time I was wasting I was reminded of Macbeth horrible play anyways his wife dies and he says you should have died another day because today I can't mourn you, because his own life is in peril, while I don't have time to worry about this I have to much AD to study but unlike him I can't focus at the matters at hand. Back to my crushing of confidence I had came up with a whole page or 6 of quotes (not mine just ones that seemed true were interesting, or just funny) and well that was devastated. I was planning which stuffed animal for Valentines Day. In fact I wrote this horrible quote that should have died and burned, but it was pretty true.
Hey since this is over can I ask what those pictures were of
can I ask what that thing you were writing that you closed when I came near was
can I ask or should what was your buisness stay your buisness.
Don't worry I'm not mad at you just. . .somthing or another, and for any lucky readers who are still reading this and don't know me, ask if you care if not because no one does its nothing worth knowing.
One of the few things that has never failed me is cold and plain logic, I ignored it because of emotions, but once again I fall back on it just like some of my friends seem to do to me, I never didn't like it just some things seemed better. In a cold way at least this gives me time to study. No reason to waste days on the comp.. Enough time for free time for me. And that friend who I stopped talking to that one guy in my head who I could finally ignore and just say stuff to some real person, well I can go back to being his friend. I'm tired its now 1:35 good night and may have every one have sweeter dreams than me.

Study sorry no hebrew this week

Hey I have to make this quick, today hasn't been that great I couldn't even name anything that really went right, but atleast nothing went drastically wrong. Anyhow I don't get everything that happenned today like how I could keep losing people. So yea I almost got stuck at the school to 5:30 after getting everything done early. My AD team has a contest Friday and so I'll be studying all this week. So a list of hebrew words most of them I"ve probably already done.
girl yeledah
boy yeled
no lowe
yes ken
now achshav
oogah cake

another attempt 2 ha -the

Orignally this was depressing, a gaint pity party where I said was miserable about being miserable, but while typing it I actually started feeling better, and then I don't know my gf started talking to me, not for more than 45 sec at a time, but I don't know for some reason I'm back to being me, yay :), so the last 2 hours of today I've managed to get more done and lived more than the rest of the day combined. I temporarily had a counter on my site that I borrowed but it counted my hits on someone elses site and my comp. is being retarded so I can't form an account to get my own version any how, this thing keeps disconnecting and its gettin on nerves so this is the end o yea and hebrew word of today is ha___ which means "the", in hebrew its used as a prefix. Anyhow I 'm gonna get off quick before it disconnects again

thanks todah

hey today was actually kind of interesting or rather yesterday. The morning was pretty normal ate breakfast, talked to a person, got a comment yay, and then tried to memorize CLassical songs for AD upon hearing apart of them I have to be able to recognize. Pergulessi Opera, Haydn's opera,2 of his symphonies, and a quartet, Mozart's 3 operas,piano concerto, quartet, and quintet, and Beethoven's Eroica symphony and two of his quartets. Some of its easy some of it sounds almost exactly the same. Then comes the more fun while I was waiting for colorguard thing to end knowing it wouldn't be over in 4 and a half hours, all of a sudden, one of my friends is upstairs standing next to me, almost like a dream. Then he tells me to call another friend and we played some games I really wanted to check if someone was on when I left but I had to flea pretty last second they stayed and played with my brother a little bit. Then came back at 10:30 when I got back home and we played around till 5. On the way home between 6:15 and 10:30 we got pulled over because my dad pulled out in front of a cop and nearly caused a collision she wasn't to happy and then I was like todah adonai (to myself) because we didn't get a ticket. Anyhow todah is thanks in hebrew

good week shevuah tov

sining: shevuah tov, shevuah tov, shevuaah tov, shevuah tov. . . a good week, a week of peace, may gladness reign, and joy increase. Someone obviously can't translate, just playing. shevuah means week and for those who don't remember tov its good. I love that song, and I actually went to services last night we don't sing it unless its a USY service but it reminded me of it. My mom actually decided to go so I offered to go with her although I figured out why she didn't talk herself out of going this time, the service was lead by sisterhood and she had this one english page to read. Anyhow it was fun I saw this weird guy Zach someone should ask about him. and then my old firends Margalit and Debbie. At one point they were all talking aobut going to Israel except Margalit who said the service had reminded her of it. anyhow it was. . . fun for the most part I couldn't get home forever my mom with a whole bunch of ladies, yea they'll never stop talking. By the time I did get homemy dad and brother were looking at camping backpacks online they got nothing done, and my dad was complaining how since he cleared out the C drive Explorer's been so faulty that it took him 4 days to get the 1st patch. So I said why don't you get Netscape and he said the comp. won't last that long. So anyways yesterday was basically good nothing really special. I'm really becoming more and more curious about more and more things that probably aren't my buisness. O and the colorguard's having a competition today so good luck to all of them, and since my gf's in the crew I'ld say good luck to them, but I think as long as theres no freak of nature thing it should all work well. Hopefully everyones week can be a good week, a week of peace, with gladness reigning, and joy increasing. Well until tonight :) I'll continue to do somthing.

eevreet

Today was pretty bland, about as neutral as it gets. I'll take that as a good thing though because its still better than a bad day. Thoughtful question of the day I spent to much time thinking of it came up with an answer and didn't like it so thought about it again. Have you ever not realized you were doing anything and then suddenly realized you really screwed up. I almost did that today, that wasn't the question just kind of my rambling leading up to it, so which is better to follow a deep curiosity that youre pretty sure whoever buisness it is doesn't want you asking or giving them privacy, now right off the answer that seems fair I went with but I always choose that choice, and so I finally with this post kind of half way chose the mean one, but if you read this and you do happen to figure out what in the world I"m talking about I'ld love to ask but I'm not going to so if ure clueless as to what I"m talking about or just have an answer post or ask me. Anyways that was much longer than intended or it was worth but I don't have much to say anyways. Other than that yesterday I got beat by both a 5 and 6 year old in tennis it was one point but still It was pretty neat he got a lucky, but awesome shot off (5 year old). Today umm. . .my first real class of DC gov't the teacher bascially said the gov't went to the highest bidder not absolutely but it greatly helps and that one of the 3 guys we looked at, believed that the gov't wasn't controlled by the masses just the gov't wants us to think it is so that the masses, because when the masses have power they kill the rich and take what they have. One last question, that no one will answer but if you do. . .I'll do somthing hopefully beyond the lines of breathing. How do you cheer some one up for a day without seeing them till the days almost over. I would think me making a difference to somebody was nearly impossible, but this person seems like I should be able to make a difference but I still seem to fail. Anyhow hebrew word of the day is eevreet which means hebrew since this is my word of the day I'll add some relevance. Every word has its own meaning to each person everyone knows what a car is but peoples defintion of good, or talent differs and when you look closer and closer even peoples thoughts about cars differ some people hate them having family killed, other people love them as a life support, and some don't care. Me my words that I hear radically different than most other people that aren't expected like love and death, are empathy, existance, neutral, and good maybe I'll say others later.

I can only speak english -angleet

Today was decent for me, but other people didn't seem to enjoy it as much , but o well, what can I do. Today was fun I was showered with complements in our ensemble again and in band band he even used us as an example, that mean somthing when the trombones are the best anyways. I learned our assistant super intendant Mr. McGowan has the same name as the physics teacher and he was nice the interview for AD (Academic Decathlon) went well but I was to quiet and lacked a little confidence, but much improved. More complements yay. In AP Bio my teacher who's also my AD coach decided the class period would start with me giving my speech. She sat at the back of the class and nearly the entire time was telling me to slow down, with funny looking hand gestures. Then my band director made me leave my last class early so I could do a listening because the holiday messed things up. Anyhow he didn't start it till 5 min before school started so I was so worried I was gonna be late but my mom didn't get there for about another 25 min. I was then missed half the tennis lesson we stayed late because her next lesson didn't come so then we were late to my volunteer thing where I learned one of my favorite kids there who was being a little obnoxious was gonna leave soon, good for her, but I was like o I"ll miss her. We ate at a new Ci Ci's and got home it was fun. O and I finally made a forward step yay I hate getting nervous over the dumbest thing, ask if u really want to know. O and I would give a hebrew word but I really don't know much hebrew, which is eevreet I always used to be entirely clueless when I heard that word and then I couldn't tell it apart from English most likely I'll do tomorrow. but I finally think I have the two straight. This is really long but I'm gonna finish with a disclaimer, if anyone is reading this for the hebrew content I don't guarantee its all accurate I'm pretty confident but I'm no expert and I'm used to reading hebrew rather than trying to write transliteration.

Beautiful day-yom yofee

Hey I missed yesterday so I'll do a bit of a mix but yesterday was pretty much uneventful and todays opposite. Today was magnificent not because it was awesome and great but because I was just bountifully joyous, smiling, humming, it was wonderful but there really wasn't any particular reason kind of like yesterday I was absolutely miserable for pathetic reasons as far as I could figure, but today maybe it was the fact that I could look forward to the weekend or maybe just the thought of seeing my gf but rather than making me nervous knowing I would screw up I didn't worry so I don't know why today went well but it did. It started with AD I really should be studying that at the moment, and then I got to delay the speech as I left early for Duel Credit Gov. it was almost fun this could be enjoyable!! yay. Then. . skip till well AP Bio I got to give my speech I was supposed to say it in front of the class but teacher/coach forgot so I did it just to her and was late to lunch she was pretty impressed but I lost a line I need to double check it. then. . .skip to end of school errggh friends can ruin plans but o well. we had our ensemble it worked well. I also decided giving someone a hug who's sitting with a back against lockers might be difficult. How do you trick someone into standing, o well. It was fun although between my rushing around I barely got to see her. Today was a beautiful day or yom yofee. so hebrew word of the day is yofee.

Movies with family and mom -eema

Today could have started at several different times you could start at the technical midnight but I was at lazer tag, and if you were to start then they you might have well have started it an hour or two earlier so you get the whole event in. It was fun if you want to hear about it ask me. O and by the way I'm loving the comments I got 3 yesterday it was over 3 posts but it was awesome so thanks everyone. The other time you could start would be at 11:30 after I woke back up. Most likely the people reading this either know what I did from then on or. . . you'll find out. If your not one of those two people, comment and I'll tell you and if u r well I guess u can too. Anyhow after that I went to a movie my brother was pretty tired from his campout and we took him along. We saw Electra my mom took my other brother and his friend and snuck them into fat albert since it was sold out. then my mom asked us if we wanted to go to EB and look around which meant she wanted to go shopping with out us nagging so we went but my brother didn't catch on and so we didn't stay very long we ended up ordering a mall pizza and by the time we finished they were nearly done. Then I got to drive home, my brothers fought, slept, and woke up to fight some more. While everything seemed to be my fault because I didnt' know where the dashboard light dim controller was and didn't want to look till I was at a stoplight. All in all the day was. . . iffy good. Hebrew word of the day is eema which means mom

hehe I could post a million times today

for anyone who cares I'm here till 11:00 when I head to Lazer quest with SWUSY yay alright well now to go back to day dreaming and wathcing tv

post 2 of the day

Hey I said I would post again, yay things are not as bad as they could be I ended up having to do this 4th grade science fair from about the time I finished with the last post and have been doing that to 3:30ish. Then I kind of just sat around and talked to a few people who all seem to say the same thing, o well atleast it means most likely I should follow the advice. Anyhow as a pessimist today has gone much better than I thought it was, but as an optimist well today's not what I wanted it to be, yay for being a pessimist at good times, so. . . although tonight could go miserable I"ll switch and be an optimist and smile yay :) so eveyone have fun no matter what the situation because it could always be worst and it can always get better, so ha I win.

boker tov- good morning

Boker tov everyone or in english good morning. I know I normally do this in the evening but today I'll probably post twice but then again I might only post now. Hey I'm actually feeling kind of miserable (lowe stom) . This weekends seems like its going to be sad and dreary so if u think u know somthing that might cheer me up post it although none of you ever do. errgh anyhow I managed to still get people in trouble even after being given a warning. ada wha : (

Stom -just joking

Hey everyone reading this have yall ever waited and waited for somthing and when you finally had your one chance you screwed it up, and then by chance of a dream got a second chance and did it again. If not don't do that, if you have you only get one life don't do it again. Or have you ever waited to do somthing you knew you would be forced to do, but when the time came you ended up talking yourself out of it for something that shouldn't even be considered as an excuse. Any how today was mediocre which is good for reasons mentioned yesterday. I wrote this really pathetic but honest email and I thought they recieved but it turned out they couldn't get to their email so I got to rewrite the only part of it with a purpose on IM and am still confused, but hopefully they'll give me a responce before reading the email, otherwise well it won't really make a difference, but makes it kind of weird. My mom has been planning all week to go to services even asked it I wanted to take my gf with me but I don't think to many people think of that as a great place to go. Then it gets back to the beginning of my post but if you know and can figure out the details congratulations if u want to double check ask or post a comment. Any how our practice turned into just a fun time to talk with my friends or well one of them was just a reallly good friend a few who were just friends and the other was the opportunity I almost missed and partially did but. . .
I screwed up again aarrghh I'll jump off a building stom. . . ok that was miserable but I didn't know what else to joke about stom doesn't translate to well to english but it comes out to just kidding or just joking. A weird memory but I'll only tell anyone the story or post it if someone comments and if someone beats you to it post a comment anyways. thanks for all those who take the time to read this and 1000 times more to those who post, and to those who seriously get somthing out of this such as learning a lesson or just a smile, my thanks goes out more than you can imagine thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you and thank you some more.

No -Lowe Tov

Today was one of those days that when it ends your kind of glad its over not because some great thing is out of the way, but because tomorrow will most likely be a better day. Its not that the day couldn't have been worst or was a giant nightmare, but rather around every corner somthing went wrong not one thing in the day is even worth mentioning it was all so menial and pointless just a whole bunch of annoyances and pains like ant bites. Today was one of those days that makes life good because it makes the good days seem good. So in the end today was Lowe tov, lowe which is no in hebrew , so does any one remember what tov was post if u do. anyhow have fun I plan to and tomorrow's my dads birthday but he won't be here so we celbrated it today. Well every one have fun I'll try to :)

gawdol- great downhill day

Today started wonderful, but now it seems to be going further and further downhill by the second. I'm serious, I was about to say a little but now I'm worried at how serious this is. Anyhow I remembered the ensembe but forgot to shave we got showered in compliments It was fun and the best part of the day. I tried to join in a conversation afterwards I couldn't hear what was being said. Then class started I got one scholarship all but sent. Then the day ended I wished it wasn't a Wendsday so I could talk to my gf, but it was so I went to tennis my brother and his friend had taken my racket out of the car so I had to use my brothers I sucked. My volunteer tutoring was pretty easy I even started studying AD when there were more tutorers than tutorees. Day was still basically good. Then I got home didn't expect to seem my gf on but she was I was pretty happy but it got pretty depressing and I'm not a good bf to begin with so, I tried most likely failed, and am continuing to fail. I wish I could do somthing. Todays great (which is gawdol) downhill side is pretty miserable. gawdolah is used as an adjetive for feminine.

I have to study more than you -ott

Today was. . . well today. It started normal and boring. Then in AD they told us we need to be studying 2 hours a day, plust the 2 in the morning and the one in class. In band the brass switched rooms my friend were made a big deal of why that made no sense. I stayed awake through English, ha I win today Shakespeare 7 me 1. O and I finally remebered to take that dream catcher today. Our ensemble umm. . . became a solo we couldn't find a room and for some reason they didn't like have the band as an audience and no other room was available. I played and then almost attempted to have a conversation but umm didn't have much worthy of a conversation and for some reason got 10 times more nervous than normal and decided maybe I should just leave it. I then called to get a ride home since I was done practicing and everything else I cared to do, more or less feeling like a failure. My mom said to wait 15 min and I looked at my watch the time she said was 35 min later go figure. Then 2 min later my brother comes in the band hall and says he's ready to go and I need to call mom back so I do. I then realized I still had this dream catcher in my pocket. I was seriously debating wheather to have fun with my brother and see if he could figure out who my girlfriend was, but in the end just gave her the dream catcher I didn't think to much of it, but then she said it was sweet and gave me a hug. I no longer felt like a failure but I don't think that will work too often. So anyways I'm easily emotionally influenced, today was pretty basic, and I most likely have to study more than you which is ott in hebrew. Well actually thats the singular feminine form the singular masculine is ottah. Reminds me of a dumb story about 8, years ago give or take about a year. David could barely talk and pronouncing my name was pretty dificult for him, so the most he could say was ott and I had just learned that meant you for a girl in hebrew. So I was all insulted and tried so hard to teach him how to say my name. He finally got it to cott so atleast I was a type of sleeping ground as opposed to a girl. Yay for 8 year old mentality.

Header with love - ohev

Sorry pretend this is yesterday. It was kind of interesting got school normal time 7:00, then got out of AD 8:05 which is really early. So I walked into the band hall to a warmer welcome than I was expecting talked for a few minutes and then fled to try and make it to COM (College of the Mainland) to register for duel credit. I ended up missing 2nd so I got there earlier and later than just about everyone. Then at the end of the day I flew to the AD room to right the essay finished faster than I thought I would and I think my ensemble only had to wait 10min or so on me. Then we played till 5 it was pretty good, although were already trying to modify the piece I think its a little early for that but o well. Then I went to scouts and learned I had to have on class A wasn't verry happy at first with that, but then was like oooohh, I get to be all spiffy with my eagle stuff. So I went around the whole time saying I was spiffy and trying to help people throw a rope 20 feet, but people 5th and 6th grade seeing a lot of different types of ropes very quickly start running all over the place throwing ropes at each other and all other types of fun things. OOO and there was one rope I really liked and I"m not much of a rope fan but is some: somthing(Ann?) steel blue, anyhow size for size its stronger than steel. I was kind of joking it makes for a good self defense weapon because it hardens under force. Unfortunately it probably has steel threads in it and would most likely set off metal detectors in an air port. Anyhow hebrew word of the day is ohev which is love kind of hard to fit into a title or body but I guess I am in love. anyhow its a verb and thats the basic present form. I'm tired and can't rember how to conjugate to other forms at the moment, but the important part of hebrew that makes it all easy is understanding the roots but since I'm writing in transliteration and if you don't know the actual letters behind what I'm writing then the root becomes pretty much impossible. Anyhow the roots in hebrew don't contain vowels and in fact the torah doesn't even have vowels, supposebly it was easier to read that way. Ok thats the end of the history lesson

Initiative begins with I-onnee

Today was quite ordinary, yet still somewhat different. Hehe
Anyhow The morning was pretty bland. Actually now thtat I think back on it, I can't really remember much of it I helped my brother were math. Lunch was yesterday's dinner pretty good vegetable lasgana my mom made it, which this time was a good thing. I do remember more I talked to my girl friend depressed her, talked to a friend I haven't heard from in forever. Then I talked about him a good friend, but were total opposites. Then she wrote this whole blog post about me lacking initiative, and so we had a conversation about it, it was. . . .fun. . . maybe. Anyhow thats definately the most memorable part of my day. I need to have some initiative, I need initiative, need initiative,initiative initiative intiative initiative. So if anyone has any idea on where I can get or buy some please tell me. Seriously I need confidence and inititive and no ones reading this but her so its kind of useless to ask for advice but give it anyways. At the moment Dick Tracey is having a gun fight. So in the end I, which is onnee in hebrew, need to take initiative.

Evenings Now Achshav

I originally was gonna skip yesterday, since I'm switching to doing the updates in the evening now, which is achshav in hebrew rather than mornings for an extra 10 min of sleep . Any how yesterday was Friday and it was pretty normal. I got this weird Texas thing with my name and the year on the back. The AD coach said she was supposed to give it to me in homeroom, but forgot to. I think all the seniors got one. I got my transcript so I can do duel credit. I didn't get to talk to my girlfriend because of a tennis lesson that got rained out, and that was about it. O at the end of the day my brother asked if I wanted to go to this winterfest I was like no if I go the place is gonna be swamped with little kids. Your not gonna be able to move he finally convinced me by saying it was my senior year and in a few months we would never do anything like this again.
Today so I woke up and saw the sun rise or tried to but kept falling asleep and my house is a miserable place to watch it anyways. Then my mom started yelling because I couldn't find my transcript. Then she yelled at me for tossing it to her. So we left when we got there my brother was like o wow. He had just realized it was exactly as I said it would be. Except no snow that he could see. So much for 200,000 pounds or somthing. Well there turned out to be 4 snowpiles and my the younger of my 2 brothers wouldn't go without me then he couldn't make snow balls with his gloves so I gave him mine. It hink the most fun part was I kept getting hit by snowballs and I couldn't figure out who did it, because they always hit me in the back and sometimes it was pretty hard. David said she did and I looked back and it was some lady in a dug out area making snowballs. Anyways awhile later in the corner of my eye I see this little girl and I look over and shes the one who was throwing snowballs she was so incredibly cute. Other than that the food was overpriced and miserable as might be expected. Then I got home and since then I've been waiting for my girlfriend to get back home.
Note Achshav has the cha sound like in Channukkah

Fri-Day Yom

I still remember last year heaing one of friends be so happy it was friday the problem was it was Wendsday, maybe Thursday anyways after telling me this and me telling him no its not he said no its Friday not friday still a little confused, when he went in line to get lunch I finally caught on it was fry day. I'll never think of Fridays the same after that. Any how yesterday was definately fun. It was a gray day, yay for rhymes awesome weather and the only thing that went wrong, no one or someone didn't care about. Although I have an AP Biology lab today where I'm supposed to have 10 rolly pollys or if any northereners read this pill bugs and I didn't find any only problem with it being damp and wet, actually as I think about it the day gets further and further from perfect. I couldn't collect them because my mom decided so she wouldn't have to drive me home, I would stay another half hour when my dad got off of work. So by the time I got home it was dark and I couldn't find any. For those of you awesome people who don't know me and are still reading this I do have a license and all as a senior I just don't have a car or a parking spot
Anyways yesterday I manged to talk. yay me . Did any one actuallly wish me good luck. Since yesterday the hebrew word of the day was todays will be yom meaning day. So yom tov everyone. Another hebrew lesson the noun comes before the adjetive so saying day good isn't me being weird alright so until tomorrow at to early have fun everyone and good luck accomplishing your goals

Attempt 2

Hey yesterday was. . . fun? Then again Wendsdays always are. Except this Wendsday played with my head more than normal. It started off with turning a great opportunity into an awkward situation, before school, if you want to know about either ask or leave a comment. Then school was fine, but during band my band director decided we would have a sectinal, which I really wasn't sure if I could make I was able to but not with out skipping my tennis lesson, still not sure why that started, but its all fun, and then was late to volluntering at the Bay Area Turning Point Shelter. Which was swamped and only one out of 3 of us was there so the lady who runs the program helped out. Then as usual 6:45 i get to my synogauge and wait for hebrew school to end at 7:30 so I can go home. We ate at Wendy's and I got home at 8:20ish so fun fun fun. I was so surprised I got a 5 on my AP Biolgogy mid-term which was a modified old Ap exam. Meaning I got a 100 on a final. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyhow today I need some confidence so yesterday morning doesn't repeat itself and maybe some good luck to. So the hebrew word of the day will be tov meaning good. The o's long if your tying to pronounce it.

School

Hey dismorning I'm in a rush so if this doesn't make sence don't be surprised. Yesterday was kind of interesting. I don't do to much driving by myself but yesterday I did. I proved I have the worst navigation skills of anyone. I managed to get lost in my small city/town. Whats worst is that it was the Jr. High and even my dad laughed and he's got a history of being lost. Then my day went kind of weird, from their. I even managed to get a haircut. Todays the 1st day of school for me so thats why I"m hurrying. Hebrew Word of the Day is echad meaning one. So post a comment if your reading this I"m really curious to know if I still am at one reader or not. Thanks bye gotta leave.

Last Day

Hey everybody, I'ld say I get to laugh at all you who go back to school today, but the only people reading this probably don't. Any how yesterday was kind of boring, but thats one of the last times I'll get to bored for awhile since school starts tomorrow and all. Whats' Data King Co. they keep calling on my Internet Answering Machine but never leave a message. It's sad when I've already managed to screw up and cover it up, its only the 4th day so far. Hebrew word of the day will be emmett meaning truth. Oo that reminds me of a hebrew word stom that will be tomorrow's we had fun with that, for my half year of conversational hebrew. That was my attempt to learn it after stopping for about 2 years, and being miserable then, well I could read it well(when the vowels were there), but I was miserable at translation. Now it's been another year or so since that class stopped so I'm pretty miserable at it, but that class did teach me somthing valuable, one I miserable at languages of any type no matter how interested i think I am and two that I love historical facts about how languages were created and why what means what as opposed to actually being able to speak it. I realize today really didn't cover anything current but then I would have said talked to my girl friend, and would have been one line boring everyone even her. So till next time have fun and succeed in everything.

hmm. . .

so. . . day 3 yesterday wasn't too much, but I saw the Aviator it's not bad. Yay I had someone comment unfortunately I still haven't put the site in my profile yet, but thanks. I think I've finally got this thing figured out it just looked like it was being mean yesterday. Since yesterday was so peaceful I do peace for my hebrew word of the day. Shalom is peace it's also a greeting like hi and it also works for bye. All us Jewish people are still hippies so peace dude and hopefully today's more interesting for yall's sake.

Day 2

This is attempt two I was almost done when my comp. died and the internet password disappeared. Now retyping the old
so. . . I'm now on my 2nd day and no one posted/commented, so sad, maybe I should tell people this exists. The break is nearing its end and I was so excited I finally had time to be bored. O & today I have somehthing for yall to comment on. What was your New Years resolution? Yesterday I saw the Day after Tomorrow. Anyways back to my New Years resolution I like 4 so I'll split it in 4 parts.
1) The 1st is to be happy and enjoy this last year before college
2)Self Improvement this goes along the lines of be study, being jewish, be a good brother and stop putting my self down so ofter
3) Finish what I'ld like to finish before I leave
4) Finally to keep my resolution I plan to do some things on a weekly basis because Rosh Hashana I gave up before it even started, so this is my 2nd chance.
Everybody's resolution doesn't have to be anything near this length in fact 2 or 3 words is fine as long as u say somthing. Anyhow now the hebrew word of the day arbach is 4
o and for those who want to count: echad, shteim, shalosh, arbach thats as high as I can count in hebrew yea I know its pathetic

so. . .

Hey! looks its me, I have my own thing, I guess I'm supposed to type in it. So here goes I'm pretty weird, if you think your weirder, fine think that, anyways if anyone reading this would post often that would be awesome. I probably won't be on as often after awhile, anyways This is the beginning of the secular year and so Shana means year thats hebrew. O by the way I'm jewish if u don't know me and for a few who do and are as clueless as I am, so I'll have fun I'll try to translate a hebrew word every post