ahhhhh

"Caring, dilgent, loving, friendly all great qualities about myself, but my greatest one I would have to say is tolerance" began one of todays impromptu's but my ability to tolerate much more has run real thin. Today was sh*@$% It would have been miserable even had a been a normal good day, but know it wouldn't even give me time to wallow in my pity, it just had to make a mockery of me and the day started half decent and fell into a horrible oblivion. I ran out on my friend while he was giving and then I ran through the band hall to get to Gov't AD was normal and band I seemed pretty ignored our section that was picking up so many complements before and now we were suddenly the ones who needed the most help although I didn't help any. Calculus was bleh, and AP Bio was alright. Lunch I think I ate bad chicken nuggets. and english we took a test. and then Lab management the lovely teacher only trusts me so the other kids weren't even allowed to help they were only allowed to stand by and laugh at me. Each class seemed to last an eternity, and every second was pretty painful. AFter school the fun began. I had to run to AD and do a band ensemble this genius brain child decided that the day before a listening was not important enough to practice and left with out even stopping at the band hall to pick up his horn. I got two people to give me hugs and try and comfort me, the first one was pretty hypocritical a guy breaks up with her friend and she stops talking to him, but her friend breaks up with me and she can comfort me. . .thanks. Then the next person should have comforted me, but it didnt' and when I left to do AD I kept meeting people, I really wanted to be left alone for once, and now people start appearing, and I got another hug from a person I really don't know. Then I ran back realizing the practice was right next door to where I started I screwed up a couple impromptu's and went back to practicing, another one of her friends decided she wasn't "feeling good" so I said I would take her listening time this weekThen when I got in the car I went on a search for my brother and couldn't find him so my mom spent 20 min yelling at me because he was no where to be found, in the middle of this she justs breaks it to me one of my best friends could be going to jail. I can't complain over anyones shoulder because I can't tell anyone the situation its not my buisness and the one person I might have, well that died. There was a fourth hug it just never happenned the only one I looked forward to, but o well.
I haven't started on my anything. I have tons of homework, and work to do. My . . .don't know what to call her at the moment, wouldn't even talk to me. Ahh probably because of what i asked, she could have just said she didn't wan't to answer. I don't know I'm pretty screwed up and lost at the moment, this is the first time I ever thought I might be ready for college and leaving this high school might not be so bad. O and more and more stuff keeps getting blamed on me I can't even remember what else was my fault but it was somthing done. I'm probably sick I don't have time to take off but I really would laugh if I ended up not showing tomorrow.

On a happier note in Gov't
Dahl's definition of power: the ability of one entity to contol in some way the behavior of another
So everyone has some power and if you don't believe find some one close to you, and tell them I love you, if you feel uncomfortable go find some one of the opposite sex now watch what happens now tell them ore some one else you hate them, most likely neither of these was entirely ignored, and you managed to manipulate them in some way maybe not for the goal you wanted but there is atleast one person you can affect.
O and one of my last hebrew things but I'm gonna use lite hebrew and no transliteration. hebrew goes right to left so this is going to be a bit complicated.
_ '_ l_ _
` _l l\l l l l l l\l here for those who can't read that its near impossible. and the letters in english order are written underneath.
aleph-tov lamed-vav aleph-nun-yud
silent t l o silent n ee